Just In Case There Was Any Question
April 10, 2008
Turn up the volume and click the right arrow to hear what is the one most true thing.
["You Are Being Loved" by Steven Curtis Chapman from his album "This Moment"]
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Posted in Audio/Video, I Wish I'd Drawn It, I Wish I'd Written It, Love and Grace
April 11th, 2008 at 9:11 am
I am a Christian and have been for eight years now. I used to go to a very conservative non-denominational church and I thought I loved it because I finally had friends and people who I thought loved me. I believe now that that was totally wrong. While there, I told several friends that I thought I was gay, and all I ever heard was that it was wrong, an “abomination” before God, and those people offered to pray for me. I was also struggling with severe depression and they would all tell me that my sin was keeping me depressed and away from a fulfilling relationship with my Savior. I left that church in April of 2006 (thank God!), and was healed of depression on June 23, 2006! My life had never been better. Then the “struggle” began again and I was again not feeling real great. I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend Stacey for four months. She lives with me and I could not be happier. Only one problem. Although I am happy and am trying desperately to come out of the closet (for her sake as well as my own), I am still feeling terrible (having tons of anxiety, used to have panic attacks, and the depression is back, just not to the serious extent that it was before). I am in the best (and only) relationship of my life and we talk about having our commitment ceremony and I LOVE all of that stuff. Stacey is the BEST person I’ve ever met and she’s simply wonderful in EVERY way. I just can’t seem to bust out of the closet or reconcile my faith with my sexual orientation.
April 11th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
Megan-I encourage you sister to take your time, no pressure, work at coming out at your own pace and don’t feel guilty if it takes you awhle, everyone’s has to work through this kind of stuff at their own pace. Be blessed!
April 13th, 2008 at 6:31 am
I love the truth in that cartoon. How often I have felt that way myself and missed His showing me His love at every turn. I’m so thankful that He doesn’t stop.. even when we don’t feel it!!! His love is unmeasurable and we can do NOTHING to have Him love us any more of any less than He currenlty does!!!
Megan, you are so not alone in your experiences, feelings and questions. I agree with Stephanie move at your own pace. Guard your heart. I pray that God will lead you every step of the way and give you the words to share at the right moments. Also, that He would touch those places in your heart that were devastated by those you were in community with. That He would remove the lies and replace them with His truth!!! That word “abomination” is used out of context so very much by those who do not understand the word.
April 13th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
I needed this today! Thank you for sharing it. Why is it so easy to let the things others think about me and my relationship with God influence how I feel about me and my relationship with God? Thank goodness that my faith isn’t based on how I’m feeling at the moment!
April 13th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
Anita, thank you for your post.
April 14th, 2008 at 4:26 pm
saw that my blog had received several hits from here so thought i’d come and say hi and spread the love a bit.
megan… as a non gay male, i’ve never had to go through the ‘coming out’ thing… i’ve never experienced the awful injustice and hypocrisy at being labelled or judged for my sexuality. but i am broken… i know what panic attacks feel like… i lived through a panic attack that didn’t even start to go away for six months, and ten years on i still deal with what that has done to me mentally and physically. the effects are profound.
so from one struggler to another… where others judge you, or you judge yourself, god offers grace and peace. your relationship can bring light to your world and that of others. the kingdom is alive and well in a myriad different kinds of relationship. just be real and honest… don’t be fretful, god loves you. those who have called your sexuality an abomination clearly have no clue about the reality of these things. don’t allow these people to rule your decisions, they do not speak for god, they speak from cotton wool comfort zones where they hide for protection.
the best thing any of us can do is strive to be real and honest and engage in the struggle together.
i hope it’s okay coming over and commenting, but i figured i might be welcome. i don’t know why the sexuality issue is important to me, except to say that i hate injustice. i hate that others are judged for an orientation. seems to me that in some forms of church any old filth can spew from your mouth and it is fine, just so long as you are not gay.
it is great to see such important and honest conversation taking place here.
April 14th, 2008 at 4:56 pm
Jon–> It’s not only okay for you to stop by and comment but it’s an honor that you would. You are indeed welcome here. Thank you for sharing your creativity talents and your sincere heart.
April 15th, 2008 at 2:28 am
thanks anita…